Don't Ever.

All I want is for you to Hold Me Tight and Never Let Me Go.

All I want is for you to have the courage to go through this together.

All I want is for you to believe that WE can, YOU can.

All I want is for you to have faith.

Not in yourself, not in me, but in US.

I have a lot of things to say to you, dear boyy.

Things like I don't really mind your mind-fucking games. Its just that sometimes it turns into heart-fucking games. And that sucked. Big time. I love you Sayang, and I don't want you to change and stop all these funny games that you are playing, giving me clues and sorts. Because we had fun that way, our own unique way. BUT for every 2-3 days you keep on playing with my heart (and feelings), i also cannot tahan. Please do not tell me that you can?? -.-''

"3. You respect him. You don’t want to change the essence of who he is. There may be stuff that irritates you in everyday life — he insists on wearing his favorite holey T-shirt, he eats sugar cereal for dinner, he still watches Saturday morning cartoons — but you like him, plain and simple."

- from my own tumblr post

Thats how much I don't want you to change. Get it Bitch?

And I miss you, I really do. :( I miss your voice, I miss your texts, I miss your lips. I just miss everything about you.

Simple enough you should just read my tumblr post under the Title :

15 Signs that You're Meant To Be Together.

Scroll down till you get the Title.

I really do want this to work out, I really do.

Things that I am looking forward to w.i.e:

1. Sentosa with Mr Idiot.
2. Batam with my Cousins.
3. Ungu at City Plaza
4. Ungu's Mega Concert

Movies to watch:

1. How To Train Your Dragon
2. When in Rome
3. Shrek Forever After
4. Sex & The City 2
5. Toy Story 3
6. The Karate Kid
7. Eclipse
8. Step Up 3-D
9. Nanny Mcphee and the Big Bang
10. Resident Evil: Afterlife 3-D
11. Jackass 3-D
12. Saw VII
13. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1
14. The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader

Yeah omg. that's like a whole list la. haha

A note to Ii

I asked Ii yesterday, "What would you answer if there's anyone were to ask when is our anniversary?" And there was this one looooong awkward moment between me and him. *crick crick crick* In which he finally answered "7th March." Hahaha.

To tell you the truth even I do not know when we officially got together. And that's because that no questions were being asked. Funny huh? Funnier part? Is that I've met him 3 years back - waaaaaay before I met Fifi OR Zaidi. Cool eh?

He sometimes reminds me of Abang, cos Abang don't take spicy food as well. Just like my dear boyy. Hehe. :) He is ze best ever. Though there are many times that he never fail to make me think and make me afraid of the "What IFs" questions.

Well this is what I'll say to you:

Dear Boyy,

I do get scared when you post those questions to me - right in the face. And I know it's because that you are the straight-forward type of person (just like Abang). But sometimes I get so scared that I would start thinking that you do actually mean what you are saying. You said, and you told me not to give in. But I'm so sick and tired of getting hurt and having unneccessary fights that sometimes I would just wanna let go and run away.

I may be only 19, but I am sick and tired of all the fucking around, playing a fool, getting hurt in this never-ending game. I am tired of all that, you know? And its true ahh, I'm like hoping to settle down soon. And the fact that I'm already 19 makes it worse la. Though initially I thought of not getting married, cos I'm really scared of the commitment. But if God willing, and I were to get married, I would most prolly be getting married at the age of 24, or somewhere around there - not too old, not too young, just nice. ;)

But I am falling head over heels for my current boyy here, right now. And I really love that feeling.

Dear Boyy, I Do Love You.

♥

fuck march.

it's half way through the week and it seems that this week is a pretty week for me! :)

Saturday 27/02/10: met fid with my very the selekeh clothes. haha. we went to VIVO kan? and shopped at Cotton On. bave, i still want that 10 bucks thingy. doc says my blood sugar is low and so she forced me to eat. haha. had mee soto, but tak habis. ISHK! the after all the shopping (in which we didnt have much to shop for) it was fid's turn to eat. she had fried rice loh. and at the end of the day i had like 2 teh tarik. eh mateen biler nak gi minum teh tarik lagi?? so after that fid drooped at my place. it was like a fucking last minute thing la. hahaha. and (un)fortunately i had her to ask Ii to come down and meet us. FUCK LA. fucking damn funny la. okay, shall keep it to the three of us. then okay la. we all chatted till 0500am. :) miss you bitch.

Sunday 28/02/10: was supposed to go drinking with the rest but (un)fortunately i made plans with Ii. was quite last minute too. had a walk at boat quay and also supper there. had a couple of drinks and also quite a long chit chat la. haha. but that's about it. was awesome though.

Monday 01/03/10: i had work and it was 1300hrs to 2100hrs. i only go out at about 2130hrs la. hahaha. talked to Mateen for a while at checkpoint and when i was about to go home somebody asked "you never wait for me ah? why go back home so early?" goodness, how i wished i could wiat for you la. but i'm like working morning the next day la deyy. so anyhoos, my presentation was A-okay. ;) yay to me. reach work and was talking to Abang Zul about school and stuff. haha. :) happy happy me.

Tuesday 02/03/10: Morning shift shit la. then followed my guys to make their security pass. and then met up with Fid and we went shopping again. to bugis street. and i bought paris hilton siren. hahaha. best! and then we met up with Ii and we had dinner at arab st. fucking hungry la sia. then we split up and the rest is history.